Monday, September 9, 2019

I Will

Last night I started a fire in the wood stove from deadfall I collected around the yard. It wasn't cold enough to need it for heat, but it was nice to have it for comfort. The temperatures were in the low 40s, clear starry skies, some wind. It felt like fall. I was spending time with my good friend Tara, who was visiting for the weekend so we could catch up with each other. Beside the fire she enjoyed soup and tea and I enjoyed some pasta I whipped up, a night of simple food eaten in. She told me about work, romance, her summer. I shared with her all that is happening in my life. It was a lovely visit and a gentle reminder that good friends are worth far more than their weight in gold. Gold is just a rock, a shiny burden. Friends help you carry them.

Speaking of fall and friends! Natalia, a friend from Cambridge, has been riding with me all summer. If you follow me on Instagram you've probably seen pictures of our adventures together here on the mountain. She's learning, but naturally comfortable with horses and Friday night she and I went out after her work around sunset. It still feels like summer on the mountain, and she snapped this picture of Merlin and Mabel grazing in the high field while we enjoyed our take-out dinner of handmade PB&J and hard cider. But to sit in a field and talk, watching the sunset and my gorgeous horses that just carried us to that beautiful view... I am reminded why I deal with all this stress about the farm and making it happen - because in a few months everything could change. Because it could get so much better or so much worse - and to hold onto this life with all I got while it's mine to have.

I feel really lucky to have the women in my life I do right now. So many strong, beautiful, powerful women that encourage and support me every day. I hope they all know how important they are to me.

Friday I mailed a house payment, and that is a very good thing.  Barring any complications with ti, the farm has another three weeks to exhale. Also, the truck passed inspection, thank goodness! Now 100% of my focus is getting the cash together for a firewood delivery of dry, split, hardwood on top of the usual feed/hay/bills and other regular expenses. I have the guy on-call to deliver and soon as I can manage that I'll be thrilled to be stocking the woodshed. If I can get a cord stacked every 4 weeks through December I will be okay.

One month at a time. I will make it.