Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Stones and Straw Houses

I was over at my friends Tara and Tyler's home recently helping in whatever small ways I could to get their place built. They have been working on their home for two summers now and this spring they erected the timber frame they built together. Now it has all sorts of straw and wiring, electric hookups to solar panels, a well, and even a road leading up to it. They had a piece of forest and are making it their home. I am so proud of them, so very proud. And when I was there working on their window reveals and padding holes in the straw wall I got lost listening to music. I felt this return of inspiration I didn't realize I was lacking, and as soon as it welled up in me I felt a sadness that it had been gone so long. It was a weird moment of instant nostalgia and appreciation at the same time, like I was back in college. The heady combination of peers my own age working together on one goal while lost in their separate tasks, music playing in the background. It was all of us kids just turning 21 in computer lab, or at a portfolio review, or studying late into the night for our Typography Exams. And that made me feel younger, and wilder, and best of all - possibility. College was all about possibilities to me.

I had not felt that in a while. It was good to have it back.

There's a lot of personal changes going on around here lately. Ive been writing about it over at the Clan Cold Antler blog, but to summarize a lot of scary things are going on and I realized I could put my head down and figure it out or just collapse into this place of inaction. I asked the readers of that blog to help in a small way, which was through positive thinking about me and this farm's health. I asked if they would go outside and find a small stone and hold it tight in their fists while they imagined everything here being okay, successful and safe. Then I asked they drop that stone in a glass, and set it somewhere it can get sunlight during the daytime and see the stars at night. I asked that every day for ten days they do this with me, because I believe intention can move mountains and I believe in the power of prayer. If just one person does this with me it adds such an intensity of purpose to the healing this farm. I'll ask here too: find a stone and say a prayer that things are okay, collect them in a glass by a windowsill, if you can and want to. It is a huge help.

This post must seem odd, jumping from home building to college to stones in glass jars - but it is all the same thing: community. My community here in Veryork, the people I see on a regular basis. The community that turned me into the person I am today, my past. And the community here online as well, sending me photos through Facebook of stones in wine glasses and jelly jars. Together these three groups are what keep me and this farm going. To know there are folks I can call to help at 1AM and they will arrive. To know there are people out in the world that remember me, for better or worse. And to know that there are strangers in Canada placing river stones in their palm and imagining me in a better place.... what could be more of a community effort?

I feel lucky to have these three groups.
I hope they all know they have me if they need me, too.


12 Comments:

OpenID T. Crockett said...

I keep starting this and deleting it. In print what I want to say doesn't have the right ring, but I'll try one more time. Thank you for sharing the jumble of feelings, the ups and downs that make up life. It's not easy to be that honest with people. We've got your back.

July 29, 2014 at 11:36 PM  
Blogger lemontreelane said...

I will find for you the first stone today...

July 30, 2014 at 8:14 AM  
Blogger Sammy Q said...

I too will find the first stone and do the same! I believe in the same power that you do... Sending good vibes your way :D.... Also is there a link to subscribe to clan cold antler? I'd like to check it out!

July 30, 2014 at 10:57 AM  
Blogger farm foreman said...

Done. Stone and intentions are warming in the sun for you.

July 30, 2014 at 12:28 PM  
Blogger farm foreman said...

Done. Stone and intentions are warming in the sun for you.

July 30, 2014 at 12:28 PM  
Blogger Tanya T said...

Consider me one of the flock, sending positive vibes your way.

July 31, 2014 at 9:04 AM  
Blogger Carlos Rodriguez said...

stating the obvious here, but,maybe a big one time gift from parents could help? even sending you some gas $ or gift certificate for feed, afterall family is family and they can lend a hand. possibly take on a summer boarder that can pay a small fee for doing farm work and learning..ive got my stone in hand and sending out side of the box thoughts your way! all great things..

July 31, 2014 at 10:23 AM  
Blogger Jenna said...

Carlos that is not an option, every family has a different situation.

July 31, 2014 at 11:04 AM  
Blogger Carlos Rodriguez said...

i hear ya, my wife and i are in the same situation with farming, just trying keep floating..in fact when all else fails..we do! hit the swimming hole that is :0 keeps our minds at ease for a time..by the by i wondered if you ever thought of having i pig workshop? raising and butchering at the farm that could be a huge draw for your farm! id bet that could open a whole new set of doors so to speak!

July 31, 2014 at 2:35 PM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

There is no sunshine to speak of in my neck of the woods but I will find you a rain soaked stone when I get home this afternoon and hold it until it's warm, wishing good things for you the whole time!

How does one join Clan ColdAntler, again? Inquiring minds and all...

July 31, 2014 at 3:52 PM  
Blogger English sheep gal said...

Piece of green 'sea' (lake?) glass found recently on the shore of Lake Erie nr Hamburg, NY currently situated in a cute tiny oval shaped glass jar on the windowsill here nr Buffalo, NY, with positive thoughts coming your way across NY State.

Also purchased your book 'Chick Days' yesterday to read now we have our first 2 chickens. I also did a group email, forwarded on again the link to the promotional video for the Cold Antler Farm book. (Wondering why Barnheart & Cold Antler Farm books not included in your 'My Books' section on the website?). In the grand scheme of things a few more book sales wont make that big a difference, but every little helps etc...

I also keep wondering if there's any possibility of a revenue stream from any of your books being made into audio CD's or available to download on Audible?

Have a great weekend

August 1, 2014 at 9:54 PM  
Blogger kitkat said...

Hi Jenna,

longtime lurker from Australia. I admire your life choices - I have one acre, 2 dogs, 11 chooks, 2 boy's as a divorced working mum, and mostly just dream about productive gardens. But I found one of my soothing stones I collect and put it in a glass jar for you on my kitchen windowsill. I wished for health and prosperity for you and the farm, then for romantic success- actually I took that back- me first, then you). Good luck.

August 14, 2014 at 4:46 AM  

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