Monday, November 12, 2012

Riding Home

I rode Merlin for a few hours today. We were conquistadors! We traveled past mountain road, trail, and stream. We crossed a highway, trotted through hay and corn fields, and stopped to walk with neighbors and friends. Several goals were met in the saddle today, several bad habits healed and overcome. It was an amazing day on horseback, and in that photo above you can see the traveling we did together. I live halfway up that mountain on the right-hand side we are looking at. Merlin took me there.

I decided to leave my job and felt like my world was falling apart right when Merlin walked into it. I think if I was in a better headspace I would not have bought him, would not have even entertained the idea. But I was fragile, and felt that I needed him. Half a year later I am a totally different rider, different person. Much more has been overcome (and is being overcome) besides a fear of horses.

I didn't realize until I looked back at my actions and attitude how terrified I was of Merlin before I knew him. I was. I was absolutely terrified. I was scared to move above a trot in an arena. I was scared when he acted up. I was scared to do much of anything. I often think back to our first trail ride and how I was shaking until I was on him and we were walking down the road. When it's too late to worry, when is a thing is actually happening, worry becomes useless as gills on a land mammal. It recedes from evolution.

I rode Merlin back in March or April, or whenever it was, scared of a stranger. Today we worked as a team. It took lessons, patience, miles, guts, stupidity, encouragement, stubbornness, and love to make us work. It will fuel us indefinitely.


Blogger Ally said...

Love this! Haven't seen my horses recently due to work schedule, but love to read of others doing what I love most on this earth.

November 12, 2012 at 8:40 PM  
Blogger Kris said...

Jenna, what a great post. Very emotional. He is a magical horse. And you two fit together.

November 12, 2012 at 10:29 PM  
Blogger Nancy McKinnon said...

Big fan of the horse posts, just got back into riding again myself. I'd ridden saddleseat and western growing up, now I'm learning hunter/jumper and it's like learning to ride all over again. Love your horse, can't wait to have one of my own again.

November 13, 2012 at 4:09 AM  
Blogger kwdiving said...

You've come a long way! And what a joy it's been to watch/read! Always go with you gut instinct, when things are right you can feel it. I am so happy for you AND Merlin. He got a pretty great deal too.

November 13, 2012 at 6:45 AM  
Blogger CM said...

Horses are there to teach us a humanity, how to deal with emotions..especially fear and anger. I loved your post, and I am so glad you where able to work with Merlin thro your fear. I think the biggest lesson I have learned from horses is patients..

November 13, 2012 at 8:25 AM  
Blogger SouthernHeart said...

Loved this post, Jenna. Through the hard times - those we're not sure we can even live through AT the time - we're actually growing...becoming stronger. Glad to see you with Merlin enjoying the day on horseback.


November 13, 2012 at 11:28 AM  
Blogger Patrice Nelson said...

What breed of horse is Merlin? Is he very tall?
Thanks, I love your stories.

November 13, 2012 at 11:50 AM  
Blogger Lorie Hyten, adult services said...

Proud of you!!!

November 13, 2012 at 12:30 PM  
Blogger daisy said...

You go, farmer. Love hearing about your triumphs!

November 13, 2012 at 4:00 PM  

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