Thursday, January 14, 2010

we'll rescue each other

First things first. A reader posted about the earthquake in Haiti, and how some of us may be able to help. While CAF isn't set up to take any sort of foreign aid donations like some other blogs are—I can direct you here. I'm not asking readers to donate, but I will say this. Many hands make work light. Even the worst work. I'll be making a donation tomorrow. If anyone understands the kindness of charity: it's me after this winter. If all of us with solid roofs over our head give something, even just a few dollars, it could turn this world around.

Now with that said, here is what's new in this small life. I'm feeling better. Tuesday night was a horrible argument with the flu and I spent most of it either in the bathroom heaving or in bed with Jazz. He'd lay his wold head on my chest and let me scratch his ears, telling him in a sickness-induced delirium that he's cooler than Han Solo ever was in Empire, even after the part when he told Leia "He Knows." Two days of rest and a gallon of orange juice later and I'm me again. I don't take back the Han Solo comment either. Jazz is cooler.

Tomorrow I will mail out a small package/fancy begging container to the family that owns the cabin. I've collected local references, will write a note explaining about me and my hopes for the property, and a copy of my book. I'm hoping my intentions and the positive things I want to do with their land will help them decide to give me a chance.

While in a perfect world they'd want to sell to me, and a bank would grant me the loan—I need to be prepared for kind denial, a poor home inspection, or a solemn head shake from the bank. So many things can fall through...But there are all sorts of plan Bs in the works, too. Perhaps the cabin owners will allow a rent-to-own deal if the bank says no? And if they don't, a local reader and his family offered to let me (possibly) rent a cottage on their land and bring the animals along too. Which means that even if I can't buy now (though I pray it will work out) I may have a meantime home waiting for me. Just knowing that these two options have the chance to happen, helps me sleep better.

I was writing tonight about taking that first sheep class two springs ago when I first moved to Vermont. While writing about it I remembered the friend who told me about the class in the first place. Her name is Trish, and ever since she stopped working with me, I fell out of touch. Inspired by the memory, I looked her up in the phone book and called her. We talked for a while, and eventually I told her about the cabin. I told her how perfect it was, and how close I felt to having a place of my own. That I could practiaclly see the clawmarks in the air around me. She stopped me mid-sentence and told me (serious as a heart attack) '"Jenna? Did you know my mother is a mortgage broker?" I told her I did not...but could I have her number?! "Of course! HA! There is a reason you called!" she said, citing the kismet, making us both laugh. It was so good to hear from her again. And the weird coincidence felt like a second bar of a song I started writing ealier tonight when I picked up my last reference letter from Nancy over at Wayside. Things are slowly starting to happen, people.

The last bit of news I have to share is very good. Tomorrow I am getting a visitor. If you read Made From Scratch you might remember my mentor, Diana. (She's also a common commenter and forum member over at the Locals.) She's flying in from Idaho and we're spending the weekend together! Just a short trip, mind you, but a good one. There will be lots to catch up on. We haven't seen each other in almost two years, but by this time tomorrow I'll be waiting for her at the airport. It'll be good to have her back in my life for a little. Two years is a long time. Trish may meet us for coffee and yarntalk at Northshire. So, hey, how great did that work out?

Tonight I feel invigorated with the small possibilities that are starting to unfold. I am realizing with the help of my readers, solid faith in the future, and some stupid luck—I will land on my feet. A week ago I felt like the world was pulled out from under me, and while I'm still a bit shaky, I am starting to find my Foothold. A little hope is all this girl needs to stand a little taller.

And just between you an me, sometimes I lose my balance from the gratitude. It's a drunk and lovely vertigo. I dance to it, even when I fall down.

35 Comments:

Blogger Amy said...

Glad you're feeling better, in body and in all other ways, too. Stuff comes when we need it most, doesn't it? Her mother is a mortgage broker. Of COURSE.

Gratitude is a beautiful state in which to be. In comparison to world events, yes, but also for the wild generosity of regular life. Some days I complain and whine. Others, like today, I hold my head in my hands and say "thank you thank you thank you thank you..." quivering from the blessed of it. The blessedness of it ALL.

January 14, 2010 at 9:47 PM  
Blogger Life At Cobble Hill Farm said...

Glad to hear your feeling better and I do wish you and your wonderful animals the best with the cabin. I truly hope to read the update that tells us all that things have worked out.
You'll have a wonderful weekend I'm sure. We're going to the Poultry show in Massachusetts this weekend. It should be fun.
-Staci

January 14, 2010 at 10:01 PM  
Anonymous Georgia said...

It's inspiring to watch you manifest the life you want for yourself, and to have such a go with the flow outlook. It will happen!

Glad you're feeling better :)

January 14, 2010 at 10:06 PM  
Blogger Bri said...

you have my heartfelt faith that this will all work out for you! Until I can get started on my own small farm (hopefully within 3-5yrs!) I love dreaming/living vicariously through you and your flock.
May the heavens heap blessings upon you! :)

January 14, 2010 at 10:27 PM  
Anonymous Kelly said...

"sometimes I lose my balance from the gratitude."

Me too!
Glad your better and are going to be surrounded by people you adore. Life is good!

Shalom!

January 14, 2010 at 10:43 PM  
Blogger David Shearer said...

There is another financing possibility which you may not have considered yet. The owner of the property could carry the note if they sell to you. That way it would be up to them to decide if you are creditworthy, they would be the ones earning the interest, and the note is secured by their property. I've bought land like this before when banks wouldn't give it a thought. Of course this only works if the sellers don't need, or want, the proceeds from the sale immediately. It's just a thought...

January 14, 2010 at 11:10 PM  
Blogger Mary Lee said...

I'm so glad you are feeling better. I loved your post tonight. I got to the part where you said "my mother is a mortgage broker"...and had to get up from the computer and go to the kitchen for a Hershey Kiss...grinning like a fool the whole way. Oh the power of prayer and collective possitive thinking! Even if this cabin does not work out, you have options...and almost enough material for another book on how to find and purchase a homestead. What a way to start the new year - connecting with old friends and making progress toward your farm.

January 14, 2010 at 11:29 PM  
Blogger BJ Gingles said...

I read an article recently which I will quote here. "There is a certain magic that happens when you have a dream. If you stay focused on your dream the universe aligns itself to your will and things fall into place to create your will from desire to reality."

This sounds like what is happening to you now. It is great to watch.

I'm glad you are feeling better.

January 14, 2010 at 11:45 PM  
Blogger Heather said...

Welcome back to the land of the living! It sure sounds like things are turning around and lining up.

January 15, 2010 at 12:12 AM  
Blogger Carrie in Wisconsin said...

Glad to have you back! :) They say things happen for a reason, and I must say that looking up your friend again was just that! The universe is starting to smile at you again. And what a blessing for Diana to be coming for a visit. Have fun and take lots of pictures!

January 15, 2010 at 1:04 AM  
Blogger Katie said...

Oh Jenna! My heart is full for you today. The universe tends to unfold as it should and we're all pulling for you.

January 15, 2010 at 1:16 AM  
Blogger Paula said...

Jenna I sure hope that you are keeping notes from all this because I WANT TO SEE ANOTHER BOOK! This little (hah! little!) journey you are on with everybody pulling for you, and he gratitude you express so eloquently better just darn show up in a book. Even a novel. There's a lot of fodder here. If you don't believe me, you need to read some Barbara Kingsolver, darnit.

OK- I'm done. I realize you have a lot on your plate, but I hope that in retrospect, you find time to write it all done. And I am glad that you made it back to the land of the living. And by the way, ALL dogs are way cooler than Han Solo. Just a fact. Onwards and upwards, girl!

January 15, 2010 at 1:55 AM  
Blogger ammamcp said...

Thanks so much for sharing your bit of sychronicity. Had a tough day today and reading your post made me cry. Reminded me that we're not alone in this!

January 15, 2010 at 2:03 AM  
Blogger René said...

Perhaps sometimes what's needed to get you on your way is to have someone kick you out the door. I'll be sending positive vibes your way. Given the gravitational force for positivity that you are, I'm sure they'll head right to you.

January 15, 2010 at 2:34 AM  
Blogger Affi'enia said...

"I love it when a plan comes together."

Glad you are feeling better and there is so much possibility on your horizon.

I totally agreee with the many hands bit.

January 15, 2010 at 3:47 AM  
Blogger Maria said...

It is great to see you having some good luck after bad! Just to say, after resisting for a few weeks (I discovered your blog before Christmas) on the grounds of economy, I finally ordered your book last week. It arrived yesterday, and I had to restrain myself from reading all of it in one go, because then there wouldn't be any left for another day!
I love your story. It resonates especially for me as we are pretty much the same age, and I graduated in 2005 too, albeit in the UK, not the USA. Your get-up-and-go spirit simultaneously gives me hope and makes me a little ashamed of my habit of putting off things for tomorrow and waiting for the right circumstances. Anyway, as you can tell, I'm a fan :o) keep going and I hope you get your farmhouse. PS I'm guessing land is cheaper where you are, as I know there is no way I could afford even an acre over here, even with a big mortgage. If I were lucky, I could afford a one bedroom flat, with no outdoor space. But I live in a fairly densely populated part of the UK where land prices are crazy, so that's to be expected!

January 15, 2010 at 5:51 AM  
OpenID Kim said...

Jenna, the positive karma is starting to flow for you now. Something great HAS to happen.
If I received a package like you sent the cabin owners, I'd sell to you! Good idea including your book - an excellent reference, I would say!
Sending good luck wishes your way.

January 15, 2010 at 7:33 AM  
Blogger melinamarie said...

Oh so glad to hear you are feeling better. Also so wonderful to hear that the possibilities are showing up for you. You'll get to where you are meant to be. That is so wonderful that your mentor is coming. I remember her from the book and I think the visit will bring hope to the whole situation. I think I know Trish too.

January 15, 2010 at 8:09 AM  
Blogger Brenda said...

Cooler than Han Solo? Now that is cool! Glad to hear you are feeling better and I hope everything works out with the cabin.

January 15, 2010 at 8:44 AM  
Blogger Chris said...

Jenna, I am so very very happy for the possibilities that have materialized for you. It is truly wonderful that Diane is coming for a visit, it seems like perfect timing. Blessings to you and your flock. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Chris

January 15, 2010 at 8:45 AM  
Blogger Patsy said...

Hmmmm, Jenna. The signs sure seem to be pointing the way to this place. Prayer and patience will prevail.

January 15, 2010 at 8:54 AM  
Blogger Pam said...

Jenna - glad to hear you are feeling better and are going to up and about for your friend's visit.

Sounds like you have created a great plan to follow in trying to secure a new place for your self and animals. Seems like the stars are aligning for you right now.

January 15, 2010 at 8:57 AM  
Blogger bdalward said...

I've always believed that God doesn't close one door without first opening another, better door. We don't usually understand how it's worked out until often many weeks/months/ or years later. This turmoil has made you stronger and you have to keep believing you will ultimately land where you are meant to be planted. You will one day look back at this time in your life as the incubator time, or the time where you were honing skills and gaining knowledge and basically preparing for your wonderful future. Hang in there.

January 15, 2010 at 9:02 AM  
Blogger Tara said...

Hooray! Sounds like things are looking up - that's wonderful news all around!

January 15, 2010 at 9:32 AM  
Blogger Maria said...

Jenna,

So glad you are starting to find your Foothold (am I the only one who got that?).....You have inner strength, something not everyone possesses....you can't fail.

That being said, I am glad you are feeling better and let's remember to keep the people of Haiti in our prayers.

January 15, 2010 at 9:41 AM  
Blogger Vivian said...

Great news Jenna, and I am so glad you are feeling better. Things are definitely lookin' up a little - just keep the faith - there are no coincidences in this life!

January 15, 2010 at 10:52 AM  
Blogger j.c. said...

Jenna, have you seen the inside of the cabin yet? If not, hold off on sending the "begging letter" to the owner. I would also be cautious on doing too much begging. You don't want to give the impression you're desperate for this place, even if you are. :) I think sending them a package would be fine but keep the language more like "I am interested in your cabin and believe it might be a good fit for me. I would love to talk to you about it!"

January 15, 2010 at 12:30 PM  
Blogger Jenna said...

it's polite, not actual begging.

January 15, 2010 at 12:55 PM  
Blogger Jen R. (emeraldsunshine.org) said...

What a coincidence! I hope everything works out for you - I have hope that things will someday work out for me too.

January 15, 2010 at 1:10 PM  
Blogger Robin said...

Glad you're feeling better! Have a great time with Diana -- I remember her from your book and thought how cool it would to be to have her as a friend and neighbor. You are getting closer to your farm every day -- good karma!

January 15, 2010 at 2:40 PM  
Blogger Debi said...

Glad to see you're back in action and on an amazing streak of universal alignment!

Hope you have a great time this weekend!

Blessing,
Debi

January 15, 2010 at 2:43 PM  
Blogger Irma said...

Glad there are good possibilities, and a good visit, on your horizon.

January 15, 2010 at 8:48 PM  
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Blogger Jen Chandler said...

I know I"m late in commenting, but I'm so glad you're feeling better. And the news about the farm sounds encouraging. I do hope you enjoyed your time with your mentor and friend. It sounds like a wonderful weekend.

Jen

January 22, 2010 at 11:53 AM  

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